Genius quotes that were said, or should have been, said by somebody

Work without Hope draws nectar in a sieve, and Hope without an object cannot live. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breaths away." ~ George Carlin

An object at rest cannot be stopped. ~ The Evil Bomber What Bombs at Midnight

Foolproof parts often under estimate the ingenuity of fools. ~ One of Murphy's laws...

“I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.” — Bob Hope

“People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.” — Joan Rivers

“People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.” — Mike Bechtle

“When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, ‘Four. I don’t think I can eat eight.'” — Yogi Berra

“An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, ‘So far so good!'” — Anonymous

Another one which always makes me laugh when I think about it

"If you want the right answer on the internet, post the wrong answer"

Who authored it is unknown to me, but I think I read it as someone's signature on this site.